Having March Off !

Yes the rumors are true I am taking March off my blog ... Why well I just need some down time I will still be around to make smart ass comments and emails and stuff but as for bloging I think the 4 weeks off will do me good ..... The only reasion behind this is my need to take some time off posting is all ... So what can I say ...

Keep an eye out for some fantastic posts in April but its gotta be by for now my dear sweet friends ..

Love and light
see ya all soon
Sarah
big hugz

All the sleep in needed yea!

I just woke up from a 12 hour sleep wow .... Guess it was just what I needed cause I feel great! Lots to do today I have a weight workout to do today then I have to clean my house before Rob gets here tonight ... I wonder if he thinks I am a neat freak or when he will catch my house in its normal state of crap everywhere lol ...

I did end up getting that massage late yesterday .. gotta say I am sure that had something to do with my sleeping .. do you guys get a massage? if so how regular ? I try to get one every couple of weeks but some of those are sports ones and they hurt not the kinda soft feel good ones that we sometimes need ..

Aunyway just a short post to say all is well in my world once again ... and sleep is not as over rated as I thought ...

Love and light
Sarah

What a Week

Well I have made it through another week and gotta say I feel like crap at the moment. I dont really know why I just feel so tired and run down maybe I will sleep well tonight (fingers crossed).
Lets see things with Rob are really moving along but I dont know how I feel yet apart from numb He has alot of good points but I can not really see it going anywhere to tell the truth I have told him I dont know how I feel and he says he dosnt know either so I guess we are both in the same boat on that one He is coming over for a sleep over tommorow night and that will be fun as long as he understands that it is what it is and and I am not promising anything but I have told him all that so he can not blame me if things change.
I am spose to visit mum and her bunch late next week which is stressful but at the same time something I feel I should do. I dont know if I want to do that either but I guess I will feel better if I at least make some effort.
Perhaps I need a massage in fact as I type that I think thats is what I will do perhaps visit one of the day spas that are around the place cause I feel I have lost some peace that my life is centered around.
Not much else to report I guess just life is kinda boring and stressful at the same time right now ...
I will try and post more I know I have been slack of late ... sorry

Thanks for all the kind words people
love and light Sarah

Really I Just Dont care enough !!!!!

Ok been awhile I guess???? Just havnt felt like posting

The last week has seen me grow and learn so thats gotta be a good thing well perhaps it started with an email from my mum ... yes my mum who I havnt spoken to in about 6 years and before that prob not much either now gotta say I was just about to delete it without reading it but felt worth the read I mean why not right. Anyway it seems she is real sick and wanted to see me blah blah etc etc ...

Why should I was the main thought that crossed my mind for a day but then I thought well hell I am bigger than that so I finally got up the courage to call her for a chat (see I can be a big girl lol) Gotta say I didnt have to bite my tounge as much as I thought I would maybe she is sick I thought anyway we actually talked for over an hour about all kindas of crap (I guess she dosnt really know much about me) anyways she seemed happy that called and she cried alot (drama queen) It seems that she is in a bad way and wants to make peace with me while she can (I never believe anything that comes out of her mouth so will see) but also told me that my half brother wants to meet me.. I totally forgot I had a half brother lol.. I dont really have time for all there bullshit but I didnt say that I am like well who knows maybe I dont know sometime perhaps. There is alot of water under the bridge so who knows what I can forgive and forget... I am not getting any younger myself

I guess the main thing for me is I just dont care. I couldnt care less these people are nothing to me and will never be anything to me ...

The phone call ended with with her promising to call me soon and perhaps meeting them all one day ... Do I really want to do this ?? If I dont will I regret it sometime ? I think not! but who knows

I guess I should explain that there is a long story behind it all the short version for those of you who dont know about my mum is that through her neglect and basicaly the fact that she didnt want to be a mother to me I left home at 14 to live with a friend and hes familay and really have only had minnimal contact with her seince then and the contact that I have had has been less than nice that is both my fault and hers I will admit that ..... But for now I am like I just dont care Its like people I dont know and have nothing to do with me for many years they are not part of my life have never been and will never be so whats the point!!!!